| The Splendivit Report Read Arthur and Carolyn Splendivit's "Seen and Heard at the LSL" |
This unusual couple are masters of disguise. The are able to blend into a crowd. They have now harnessed this talent and
turned it into their new column," Seen and Heard at the LSL". When the Splendivits are not in costume they continue to walk
the edge of controversy. Arthur is the woman who is married for twenty five years to Carolyn who is a man. When asked about
the monikers Arthur says," Ask our parents. They dreamed it up. We've had to live with the confusion for all our lives." I did ask
their parents who happen to be parents for both Arthur and Carolyn. Gene Splendivit put it this way," When I met Samantha I
was all ready pregnant with Carolyn. We fell in love. I left my husband, he left the circus. We were married and settled down in
Spindle's Grove, West Virginia. When Carolyn was born after three days of hard labor in the back of Granddaddy Marla's
Cadillac Samantha said,' That child looks so much like my brother. I want to name the baby after him.' So we named him
Carolyn Louise Splendivit. I all ready had little Arthur the year before from my other husband. Suddenly our lives were
complete with our brand new family."
From this world springs the alternate existence of Arthur and Carolyn Splendivit.
turned it into their new column," Seen and Heard at the LSL". When the Splendivits are not in costume they continue to walk
the edge of controversy. Arthur is the woman who is married for twenty five years to Carolyn who is a man. When asked about
the monikers Arthur says," Ask our parents. They dreamed it up. We've had to live with the confusion for all our lives." I did ask
their parents who happen to be parents for both Arthur and Carolyn. Gene Splendivit put it this way," When I met Samantha I
was all ready pregnant with Carolyn. We fell in love. I left my husband, he left the circus. We were married and settled down in
Spindle's Grove, West Virginia. When Carolyn was born after three days of hard labor in the back of Granddaddy Marla's
Cadillac Samantha said,' That child looks so much like my brother. I want to name the baby after him.' So we named him
Carolyn Louise Splendivit. I all ready had little Arthur the year before from my other husband. Suddenly our lives were
complete with our brand new family."
From this world springs the alternate existence of Arthur and Carolyn Splendivit.
| Seen and Heard at the LSL |
Someone was talking how they thought the bartender was so cute and he had nice hair and the sweetest Front Royal accent.
He later went on to say when the lights dim I get gooey inside.
Son, you need a towel.
A very tall customer recently was seen scratching his head on a light bulb. When asked to stopped he walked outside on the
patio to ask a friend to stand in a chair and scratch his itchy mop top.
Holy head lice! Wash those hands!
We noticed a quiet young man with a sporty cap reading a very large book. It would have been impressive had it not been
upside down.
The book? 'Greek Rural Postmen and their Cancellation Numbers' By Derek Willan.
It probably is better upside down.
A table of four tastefully dressed young ladies sitting at a table were trading shoes under the table. We overheard one of
them complaining later that her friend's feet really smelled so she needed to rush home to shower.
Maybe and a heavy duty air freshener.
We heard a few LSL customers musing what Manager Tim would look like in hot pants.
Hot, baby, hot.
Arthur heard the LSL Nachoes were the most requested item at the Lucky Star. Next most requested was for Trevor to go on
stage and sing a Pink Floyd song.
Ooh la la.
We're not officially reporting this item but we may have heard certain LSL owner takes Belly Dancing classes and plans to put
on a dance recital sometime this spring.
Can't wait! Bring your cameras.
Finally, we were pleasantly surprised to hear a certain Day Manager singing 1976 hit song "Afternoon Delight" to a group of
Starlings munching on a piece of bread in the LSL parking lot.
Hey Buster, add that song to your stage act.
Until next time remember,
"if you can't be with the one you love
____ ___ ___ ______ ____." ( fill in the blanks )
Arthur and Carolyn Splendivit
He later went on to say when the lights dim I get gooey inside.
Son, you need a towel.
A very tall customer recently was seen scratching his head on a light bulb. When asked to stopped he walked outside on the
patio to ask a friend to stand in a chair and scratch his itchy mop top.
Holy head lice! Wash those hands!
We noticed a quiet young man with a sporty cap reading a very large book. It would have been impressive had it not been
upside down.
The book? 'Greek Rural Postmen and their Cancellation Numbers' By Derek Willan.
It probably is better upside down.
A table of four tastefully dressed young ladies sitting at a table were trading shoes under the table. We overheard one of
them complaining later that her friend's feet really smelled so she needed to rush home to shower.
Maybe and a heavy duty air freshener.
We heard a few LSL customers musing what Manager Tim would look like in hot pants.
Hot, baby, hot.
Arthur heard the LSL Nachoes were the most requested item at the Lucky Star. Next most requested was for Trevor to go on
stage and sing a Pink Floyd song.
Ooh la la.
We're not officially reporting this item but we may have heard certain LSL owner takes Belly Dancing classes and plans to put
on a dance recital sometime this spring.
Can't wait! Bring your cameras.
Finally, we were pleasantly surprised to hear a certain Day Manager singing 1976 hit song "Afternoon Delight" to a group of
Starlings munching on a piece of bread in the LSL parking lot.
Hey Buster, add that song to your stage act.
Until next time remember,
"if you can't be with the one you love
____ ___ ___ ______ ____." ( fill in the blanks )
Arthur and Carolyn Splendivit
| Click the mouth to return home |